Whisper in my Ear
by devilishlysas
Summary: Based on speculation for season 5. The twisted inner battle of the new Nathan/Sylar charachter PG-13-R Disclaimer: I don't own heroes/Jekyll and Hyde or its fab characters. Spoilers s3 and finale. Chatpers are in snapshots and not linear continuations.
1. Whisper in my Ear

Title: Whisper in my Ear  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if thats what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: The twisted inner battle of the new Nathan/Sylar Character  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13-R  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

There was no reason for him to be here, he knew that, the argument played over in his head and yet his body refused to move away.

_'I'm her father!' _But that argument failed too, his body remained immobile, hovering inches above her quietly sleeping form.

Her eyelids fluttered and he attempted not to even breathe; if she woke up... if she were to pin him with those big wounded green eyes of hers... if she tried to scream; well he wasn't convinced that his behaviour would remain purely voyeuristic.

Claire shifted in her sleep and her shirt pulled tightly across her chest, the material was so thin he could make out the dark patches of skin beneath taut nipples; his mouth went dry and he attempted to swallow the flash of lust.

An image behind his eyes formed, it was so clear he could almost remember it himself, of his hand in her hair, caressing her cheek; his fingers twitched and he fought the compulsion.

_ 'She's your daughter!'_ he snarled inwardly.

Something seemed to chuckle darkly at him from within the depths of his own mind.

_'She's not mine.' It hissed back. _

His body dropped in the air a fraction of an inch, so that he was forced to clench his muscles and suck in his chest to prevent from brushing against her.

Having her stay here had been a mistake; he'd known it at the time, tried to insist that she go back to her mother, or stay with Noah at his apartment, Angela and Noah had agreed, tried to convince her, until it had descended into cold stares and raised voices. He should have insisted on anything other than having her under his roof... just the two of them.

She'd been so coy when she'd asked. _"Do you mind?"_ Almost timidly... afraid of his rejection.

There had been no other answer, _"Of course not honey. You can stay with me as long as you like."_

It had come out of his mouth, the words had been his, but the intent behind them was anything but paternal.

Her breath fanned out over his face and he inhaled deeply, she was so close he could almost taste her.

'_One taste won't hurt.'_ The voice in the dark insisted, the very idea of it seemed to slide into his blood until it boiled with desperate need.

_'NO!' _he fought, even as his hands rose to brush feather light through her gold flecked hair, fanned out as it was across her pillow, as though displayed that way... just for him.

_'You want her.'_

_'No.' _But his conviction wavered, _'She's my...' _he couldn't finish.

_'She's yours.' _ The voice reminded. _'Ours...mine.'_

'_Mine.'_ He acknowledged silently, his claim to her was irrefutable, they were so alike.

'_She's going to love us.'_ The voice promised.

Nathan's chest felt tight, tears shone unshed in his eyes as his hands ghosted over her skin, across her shoulders and down her chest to hover over her stomach. He wanted her love... he needed it, needed to prove to her that he was just as _special_ as her 'other' father.

She was going to love him.

_'Yes.'_


	2. Idle Hands

Title: **Whisper in my Ear**  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if thats what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: Nathan's battle with his inner nature gets messy  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: R (violence/some disturbing imagery)  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

**Chapter 2: Idle Hands**

Blood, there was blood... so much blood.

Nathan stumbled backwards slipping in more of it, his mouth opened but words failed him, he was covered in blood. He blinked, the crimson soaked floor didn't vanish, slowly he brought trembling hands up to his face and stared at them in disbelief... blood.

"Such a mess." The voice from within jolted him from his mute horror and panic flooded over him. Nathan scrambled to his feet, but his legs were unsteady, his knees weak and he pitched forward sprawling in a tangle of limbs... there was blood everywhere.

"What happened here?" Nathan managed weakly, quickly putting distance between himself and the pool of blood as he backtracked on his ass. The black attire he was dressed in barely even showed the sticky red patches that were still warm through the cloth.

"I'll admit; it could have been a cleaner kill." The comment was detached, clinical, completely apart from his own frantic movements, as he attempted to scour his hands clean against the small piece of clean carpet. Nathan's panic grew as the blood remained and he scrambled further away, until his hand landed in something wet and solid. Torturously slowly he turned and looked, his stomach clenched and he lifted his hand out of the empty, bloody skull cap.

"It's so much more fun if they struggle though." The '_others'_ sniggering voice was almost like white noise past the sight of the skull cap, the complement of blonde, blood flecked hair still attached to it. His chest tightened sharply and he realised with a start he was hyperventilating; his first thought was the worst... this wasn't his Claire; it wasn't.

Crawling to his feet he noticed more blood, a smear leading into another room, a pit formed in his stomach and he felt bile rise. He didn't want to go into that room, had never wanted anything less in his life, but he had to, the blood seemed to demand it, and so he followed. The sight that met him sent a cold shiver through his entire body, and he fell back against the wall, simply standing still, staring in horror.

It wasn't the blood slicked writing on the walls, spelling out '_I am S...'_ or the smell of blood and something burnt. It was the body, lying prone in the middle of the room, the skull was gone, missing, and the brain exposed. It was a woman, small, slight, soft... he dropped to his knees, his eyes closed, shutting off the sight of the room and her dead body as he fisted his hair with his blood encrusted hands, trying to draw strength enough to even look.

"What have I done?" he whispered, looking inwards to that dark place inside where the _'other' _him watched. "Tell me it's not her!"

"Our precious Claire?" the voice taunted, mocking him now.

"TELL ME!" he bellowed into the still air of the apartment, a strangled sob making it past his lips as he quaked in terror, his whole body shaking violently.

The voice smirked, if a voice can be said to do that. "Claire can't die; even if we wanted it."

Nathan let out the breath he'd been holding and a rattling moan of relief escaped him as he buried his face in his hands, sobbing.

"You can call it self defence." The voice promised, not bothering to suppress its amusement.

Nathan opened his eyes and looked down at the body... the brain was exposed, her face streaked crimson, eyes frozen wide in agony as she died; but he would know her face anywhere.

"Tracy." He breathed, feeling the tears streaking down his cheeks as he reached out and closed her eyes. "Why did I do this... _we_, why did we do this?"

The sly voice was quick "Well she did try and kill us."

"But this... she suffered." Nathan got the impression the voice shrugged inwardly and fell silent, as his gaze took in the destroyed apartment, she hadn't made it easy... there was water everywhere; the sofa lay in shattered pieces slowly melting around them. "Why did she have to suffer?" he asked wearily, trying to understand his own mind, to understand the '_other'. _

"Because it was fun!"

Nathan's eyes were drawn once more to the blood streaked walls, to the words that trailed off unfinished, _'I am S...' _ Something about the sight brought about a fleeting flash of pride, before it was quashed by his distaste. A name hovered on the edge of his tongue and his consciousness, but he couldn't grasp it, couldn't even think it.

"No. It wasn't." He protested certain that if nothing else, the last thing this should have been, was fun.

But as he dropped his bloodstained hands from his head and rocked to sit back on his knees staring at them, he couldn't stop the way his whole body shuddered in revulsion.

His hands had found this fun.


	3. Beware Petrelli's Bearing Gifts

Title: **Whisper in my Ear**  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if thats what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: Nathan's battle with his inner nature gets messy  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

**Chapter 3: Beware Petrelli's Baring Gifts**

'_We could kill her you know."_

Nathan ignored the soft whisper, dismissing the bubble of humour in his throat as the effects of champagne.

'She's our mother.' He reminded his not so silent partner.

_'She's not mine.'_ The voice replied eerily familiar.

Nathan tried to focus to raise his champagne flute and smile politely at his family; to not stare at Claire as she celebrated her 18th birthday.

_'I wonder how she'll celebrate her 118__th__?'_ The voice posed and his left hand snaked out beyond his control and grasped a handful of peanuts; popping them into his mouth. Nathan's eye twitched; he'd never felt all that attached to that hand anyway.

_'Don't worry 'Daddy'.' _The voice hissed, taking on that self satisfied tone he recognised too well. _'We'll still be there, still be able to watch over her, to toast to many...many more birthdays.'_ The idea both horrified and satisfied him.

The gold flashed against her skin and drew his eyes to her hand, to the ring, set with a deep black onyx at its core.

_'It was a beautiful gift.' _The voice assured him. _'Far more 'special' than some necklace._ _She'd never pawn our ring.'_

Nathan smirked and glanced up at the man in question; Noah had that bland half smile on his face as their eyes connected across the room... he always looked so smug when their eyes met now.

_'He's a fool.' _Nathan agreed silently with... himself.

'Patience.' He reminded, for once asserting his will over the _other._ He raised his glass in mock salute at Noah and kept his face impassive until the other man turned away. Nathan stalked smoothly over to the small group he slid his arm around Claire's shoulders, until she turned and smiled up at him warmly.

"So are you enjoying your party honey?" it sounded saccharine even to his own ears and his _other_ was snorting in disgust at him from some dark corner of his mind.

"Yes, it's great, but you didn't have to go to all this trouble Nathan." She laughed lightly and slipped her arms around his waist, hugging him gently and allowing him to enjoy the feel of her against him, however briefly.

"Nonsense." He waved her comment away. "Nothing's too good for my Claire." She frowned slightly and he dropped a kiss to her forehead, before turning to listen politely to Noah and Angela.

_'You have to admit.' _ The voice began distractingly. _'She really is the forgiving sort. It bodes well for us.'_ Nathan winced inwardly. _'Not so long ago she was promising herself that she hated us.' _The memory of her in orange and a vast hanger swam behind his eyes, before another image slid right alongside it, every bit as real, of a hotel room... and wine.

"Nathan." Peter's voice snapped him out of his reverie. "Can we talk for a minute?"

A flash of irritation stabbed at him; it was a feeling he'd always associated with Pete, but now it seemed magnified, until he found himself brushing the underside of his chin with his thumb in distraction at the sting he could still feel there.

"Of course Pete." He replied, placing his hand between his shoulder blades and ushering him in the direction of his study.

Nathan closed the door and stalked across to his desk to lean on it easily.

"So." Pete started, folding his arms across his chest in a way Nathan recognised as defensive. "It was good of you to do this for Claire." Nathan acknowledged with a nod of his head. "Just between you and me," Pete continued; his voice low so as not to carry beyond the door. "she's been a little distant lately." Peter lifted his eyes to meet his own. "You both have."

"Don't know what you mean." Nathan replied lightly as he crossed to the cabinet and pulled out two glasses, placing them on the surface before he pulled out the bottle. "Whiskey?" he offered inkling the bottle to Peter.

"No." Pete shook his head, but the frown didn't lessen. "Is everything alright?"

Nathan chuckled. 'Not even close.' He thought inwardly. "Of course, couldn't be better." He replied aloud. "We're finally a family again, all of that's behind us now."

_'He never was too bright... too sensitive.' _The voice chuckled inwardly and he had to fight to keep the smirk from appearing on his lips. Peter remained silent and Nathan redirected his full attention on his weary face, his back was rigid, his lips pressed thinly; he recognised those signs.

"Is there something on your mind Pete... something you need to tell me?"

"Shapeshifting." Pete replied sharply, and his inner voice perked it's ears up at that.

"What about it?" Nathan replied stiffly, the subject made him uneasy, but he couldn't be certain why.

"I... Nathan, I don't think I can handle it." Peter admitted finally, dropping his head in defeat.

_'Well that's a shocker.'_ The voice chuckled lightly and he was forced to agree.

"Mom's got me working on this assignment, infiltration for the Company." He ran his hands through his hair in frustration, "I feel like I'm losing myself Nathan."

_'We can sympathise... can't we.'_

"Nathan." Peter continued looking agitated and so damn tired that he felt a momentary flash of pity for him. "The other day I went to sleep... and when I woke up, I wasn't me!"

Nathan nodded supportively. "Yes, well that sounds... disconcerting."

_'Familiar'_ His inner voice corrected smoothly.

"Nathan, I need to get rid of this ability... I think I'm a little afraid of it, I can't control it, last time that happened..." he trailed off and Nathan felt a flash of pain score his left side and he winced inwardly, he remembered burning... a second pain shot through his chest... he remembered being stabbed.

_'Careful.' _The darker self hissed.

"Nathan, can I..."

Nathan cut him off smoothly "Take Claire's ability." Pete looked startled and frowned his mouth opening as if to argue. "I'm sure Ma won't mind if her son becomes indestructible. I'll smooth it out with her about the assignment."

Peter blinked and a slow smile crept across his features as he visibly relaxed.

"Besides you know how Claire worries about you." Nathan continued, "What with you out there doing the whole Agent thing, whilst she's stuck in college. This way she'll feel like she's helping too."

"Nathan thats..." Peter grinned having to drop his eyes and Nathan wondered for a brief second if he was actually crying. "Thank you, you have no idea what a relief this is."

"Anytime." He replied smoothly, embarrassed for the both of them.

The study door closed behind him and Nathan stared down at the bottom of his glass as he swirled the liquid before throwing the entire contents down the back of his throat. He didn't even get the pleasant tingle before the numbness when he drank anymore... nothing.

_'He's a problem.'_

'I'm handling it.' He assured.

_'We should kill him.'_

'He's my brother.' he found he had to remind himself.

_'He's not mine.'_


	4. Conversations with a Dead Man

Title: **Whisper in my Ear**  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if thats what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: Nathan's battle with his inner nature gets messy  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

**Chapter 4: Conversations with a Dead Man**

'_A __**dichotomy**__ is any splitting of a whole into exactly two non-overlapping parts'_

Nathan sat in the uncomfortable armchair in the small almost clinically tidy apartment; the only thing out of place was the photo frame. The fingers on his left hand twitched and the photograph leapt across the room as if on a string to his waiting hand.

That had been happening a lot recently... to his left hand.

Slowly he took in the image captured within the frame, the Bennet's smiled up at him as one.

For once his two selves were in agreement and when that happened, everything always seemed so much clearer.

'There's something different about us.' He vocalised finally the gnawing concern that had been churning in the pit of his stomach for months now.

'_More so than usual.'_ The _other_ agreed from within.

'I don't kill people.' Nathan reasoned.

'_I do.' _The voice menaced.

'I can fly.' Nathan argued with distain.

'_I can do anything.' _The voice replied with the distinct twang of pride.

Nathan grimaced and placed the photo frame face down on the coffee table in front of him, and pressed his index fingers together bringing them up to rest against his lips.

'Am I insane?'

_'You're talking to yourself.'_

Nathan felt the smirk tug at the left corner of his mouth.

'Are you certain then, that he's hiding something from us?'

_'He can lie to all of them, to his precious Claire and poor Sandra, but he can't lie to me.'_

The lock clicked in the door and Nathan remained sitting quietly waiting as it opened and Noah Bennet stepped inside. His head rose and caught sight of him sitting in the dark his face in shadow.

"Nathan?" he asked in mild surprise, but there was the definite flicker of something else in his voice... Nathan imagined it was irritation; the _other_ thought it was fear. Noah's eyes flickered to the photo frame sat face down, and then back to him.

"How did you get inside?" Noah asked his voice even as he indicated the previously locked door.

"Window was open." Nathan replied smoothly.

Noah glanced at the offending window with a frown, after all the man was anything but careless, even if he was on the 22nd floor.

"What can I do for you Nathan that couldn't wait until the morning?" There was a dismissal somewhere in that Nathan was certain.

"Have you ever read the 'Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde'?"

Noah went unnaturally still, but his face remained impassive, it was truly quite an impressive facade.

"I'm familiar with it." Noah replied finally, removing his jacket and throwing it carelessly on the back of the sofa beside him, giving a flash of the gun holstered beneath his suit.

"It's a fascinating story." Nathan continued; keeping his eyes firmly on Noah Bennet, waiting for the nuance the _other_ promised was there. "The strange dichotomy that exists between the monster and the man."

"I suppose." Noah replied, moving to lean more casually against the breakfast bar, but he never turned his back, and there was a tension in his shoulders impossible to miss.

"In the book they are written separately, distinct from one another, separate individuals; representing good," he smirked, "and evil." Noah's hand rose ever so discreetly until it brushed the weapon beneath his suit.

"Is there a point to this Nathan? Because it's been a long day and I wasn't expecting a literary debate this evening." Noah snapped, but his expression was no longer the impregnable facade.

"What do you suppose would happen if they were truly forced to co-exist?" Nathan mused, "Neither one sub-conscious, or conscious, but something else... something new." Noah's breathing had quickened and Nathan imagined he could almost hear his heartbeat increasing fractionally. "Do you suppose the man might become the monster... or would the monster discover his humanity?"

"In my experience; the man is always stronger than the monster; because the monster is fundamentally flawed... he is alone." Noah replied with such utter conviction that Nathan paused and the _other_ twitched.

"I wonder then Noah." Nathan felt the words slide over his tongue, his own and the _others_ again they were in a agreement. "What does that make you?" Noah flinched and Nathan's lip pulled up into a feral smirk from the left side. "You are so very alone now after all."

The gun was in Noah's hand and pointed at his head in barely a heartbeat, Nathan stared at it mildly bemused, he wasn't afraid, the gun seemed to pose no threat, although he was certain it should.

"Get out of my apartment Nathan." Noah snarled. Nathan felt irritation prickle at the nerve of this man to order him about as he slid to his feet.

"_No_." His voice resonated and Noah gripped the butt of his gun more firmly, his hands were steady and his eyes dark.

"That wasn't a suggestion." Noah bit off sharply but Nathan watched as the single bead of sweat slid across his brow.

"Tell me something Noah." Nathan continued unconcerned. "What would you tell Claire about why you felt it necessary to put a bullet through her father's head?"

"I'm her father!" Noah roared and the gun edged closer to Nathan's face, so close it almost brushed his nose.

"No..." Nathan felt satisfaction rush through him and the violent desperate need to tear this pretender apart. "You were just the man they gave her to!" He lunged and the gun went off, Nathan blinked staring at his hand wrapped around Noah's throat as he hung suspended in the air, clawing at the hand in a vain effort to release it; and then down at the blood that pooled across his own chest, spilling down from the wound in his neck.

"Nathan... stop!" Noah spluttered, until his fingers tightened and he couldn't utter anything else.

"Nathan would." He replied quietly, drawing their noses level as he felt the blood drying on his collar. "But I'm not Nathan am I... at least not only Nathan." Noah struggles began to become listless as his lips turned blue and his eyes bulged, his mouth opening and closing wordlessly.

"How do you like my Hyde?" Nathan snarled and his left hand twisted, there was a crack and Noah's body went limp, his head lolling to the side at an unnatural angle. Nathan dropped the body and stood back quickly his breathing heavy as his left hand curled into a fist at his side.

"No, what did you...?"

"_We."_

"We didn't!"

"_Oh yes we did."_


	5. How a Broken Heart Bleeds

Title: Whisper in my Ear  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if that's what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: The twisted inner battle of the new Nathan/Sylar Character  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13-R  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

**Chapter 5: How a Broken Heart Bleeds**

They were alone in his terrace house when the call came, her mobile buzzed insistently before it broke out into some irritating little ditty that gave away her age. Nathan heard her sobs from his office as they gave way to a wail of such agony that he couldn't ignore it.

He entered the living room quietly and simply stood in the doorway watching as she sat on the floor, her back against the couch with her face buried in her hands, her knees drawn up to her chest; her entire body seemed to be shaking with the force of her grief.

Guilt wormed its way through every fibre of his being until even the _other _squirmed at its touch. He'd hurt her, _they_ had hurt her... the very idea of the pain he'd so obviously caused her sickened him. Whatever else was wrong with him, what was happening inside him, he wanted to protect her, keep her safe... he didn't want her to hurt.

_'Comfort her.' _The voice hissed at him as if he were some sort of fool.

'We did this, I can't comfort her for something we did... it's sick.' It was insanity to try and convince himself; his feet were already moving.

_'Stop making this about you... or us.' _The voice snapped, the irritation washed over him, he was disgusted with himself. _'You can give her the support she needs, make her pain easier, so suck it up!'_

"Claire." He called gently, he'd managed to reach her side of the couch without her notice and she jumped slightly, her head shot up and he felt his stomach clench unpleasantly as bile rose into his mouth, heartbreak seemed to be carved into every inch of her face.

"He's dead." Her voice trembled and in a second she had launched herself from her collapsed position into his chest. There was no other option as his arms went around her, holding her firmly as she clung to him sobbing her heart out. Nathan could feel her tears soaking through the material of his shirt.

The voice seemed to roll its eyes at him. _'Ask her who it was.'_ Reminding him that after all, he wasn't supposed to know what she was talking about.

"Shhh, talk to me, tell me who." He breathed, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"My Dad." It was all she seemed able to say as she dissolved, her legs gave out and he took her weight easily, sliding her up into his arms with ease. Looking heavenward and knowing that someday someone would make him suffer for this, he sat down on the couch and let her curl herself into his lap, safe at least for now in his arms as she cried herself out.

His inner self was busy preening, with an odd sense of pride and accomplishment; that she was clinging to him in her time of need. But something stronger was pulsing through him, something paternal, he didn't want her to need him because of this.

He didn't tell her it was going to be okay, a part of him couldn't lie to her, it never could. It wouldn't be okay.

"I remember losing my father." His voice was soft, he wondered if she'd even heard him above her sniffles, but she tensed. "Yes Claire." He continued quietly, "I'm going to give you the 'I understand what you're going through' speech, but hear me out a moment." She was still in his arms, her head buried somewhere beneath his chin, but she didn't protest, he was certain however that inside she was practically screaming at him.

"I remember losing my father... for the first time." She twitched and he ran a hand along her back, trying to soothe her. "I even scattered his ashes, just like you did for Noah the first time." She moved, her head rose and he looked down at her, her eyes were red, bloodshot, the tears had dried on her face and her hair stuck to the side of her face... she was still beautiful... his beautiful Claire. His hand rose and he couldn't help it, he ran his fingers across her cheek brushing it back so he could see her face clearly.

"My father was my hero." Her eyes narrowed. "Granted I didn't realise what a sick son of a bitch he was back then... back then he was just Pa. A man that had supported me through everything, guided me, taught me everything worth knowing, or so I thought. I loved him, quite probably more than I loved anyone." She was listening intently now and his hand slid across her shoulder and down her arm, she leant into his touch, looking for comfort. "When he died, well it didn't matter that the last thing I'd said to him was in anger. I'd blamed him for Heidi's accident, was convinced he was in bed with Linderman, everything I believed about him was shattering around me, and it didn't make a damn bit of difference. He was my father, and his death hit me like a truck, suddenly the whole world just felt wrong."

_'You should tell her how we felt after mother... it was an accident after all.' _ An image of snow globes, of snow and scissors overcame him and he blinked away tears.

"When he died the second time, I thought somehow seeing his body like that, after everything he'd done, to Pete, to mother... what he would have done to you; well I thought it would be easier. My father was a monster. At the time I knew that, but I thought I could salvage something of his plan, that I could take something positive out of his life." He sighed wearily and felt her hand close around his, he squeezed it back appreciatively. "I was wrong... I was trying to be my father's son, and it all went so wrong." It was as close to spilling his secrets as he was ever going to get, it was fitting it was to the one person he wanted to be honest with.

"I'm not going to tell you it will be alright Claire, because it won't, he was your father, he raised you, loved you, protected you, risked everything for you... hell I think somewhere along the way he even mortgaged his soul to people like me to keep you safe."

_'Lied to you, hurt you, abandoned you, made you weak, vulnerable...neglected you!' _Nathan clamped down on the rage that lashed him, a part of him was not sorry Noah Bennet was dead, a large part of him could even see the benefit in him being dead. In fact he was afraid that the only reason he was sorry Noah Bennet was dead, was because of the effect it would have on Claire.

"What am I supposed to do without him?" She leant forward into his chest once more and he tucked her head beneath his jaw, biting down on the comment he longed to make.

"You will get through this, but it's going to hurt for a long time Claire."

_'I did warn her, that the only pain she could feel now would be from a broken heart.' _The inner voice sighed, _'She should stop wearing it on her sleeve; it's very un-Petrelli of her.' _

The front door banged open and Pete's voice called out into the quiet air. "Nathan, Claire!" Claire didn't move from his arms, she tensed ever so slightly, it was the only clue she gave that she'd even heard her favourite Uncle's panicked cry. Nathan looked up in time to see his crestfallen face appear in the door as he took in the sight of her, the indestructible girl, fragile once more in his arms.

Peter darted forwards skidding to a halt at the edge of the sofa and reaching for her loose hand, she squeezed it back but didn't look up or move from the safety of his arms. The smirk tugged at the corner of his lip unbidden as he raised his eyes, they locked on the dark unfathomable ones in the doorway, it was too late to mask the expression, Ma's fast twisted in disgust, but it vanished just as quickly.

_'Noah never acted alone, he was always a puppet. A smart, ruthless, highly skilled puppet, but a puppet none-the-less." _The voice whipped through him and he struggled to unclench his left hand. _'I think it's time we had a talk with mommy dearest.'_


	6. A Mind's a Terrible Thing to Take

Title: Whisper in my Ear  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if that's what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: The twisted inner battle of the new Nathan/Sylar Character  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13-R  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

'_I think it's time we had a talk with mommy dearest.'_

**Chapter 6: A Mind's a Terrible Thing to Take**

Nathan had avoided her long enough, but even he couldn't ignore his mother forever, he shoved his hands in his pockets as he waited for the elevator to take him down to the basement of the new Company facility. Her urgent requests for him to come and meet with the new company heads, and set out a game-plan to catch this new Sylar copycat had finally reached a scolding tone of voice.

_'You do realise this is a trap?'_

Nathan didn't even bother with a response; they were both quite aware of that, had been from the moment Ma had shown her true colours as she'd watched him with Claire.

'Are you concerned?' he taunted, feeling both his internal and external self smirk... they weren't. It was a good thing that Claire and Pete weren't here, she had returned to her mother for a little while, Pete had gone with her, at his insistence of course... there was a killer on the loose, couldn't be too careful with precious Claire.

Nathan strode with assurance through the facility knocking sharply on her office door and not waiting to be invited as he pushed the door open and stalked inside. His eyes took in the scene with mild interest, so these were the conspirators... these were the ones to blame. The smile flashed on his face, all teeth, Heidi used to call it his politician's smile, he couldn't help but agree as he closed the door firmly behind him.

"So." He began, his eyes watching Parkman mildly as he stood behind the desk, besides Ma, to the Haitian who was leaning casually against the fireplace. "You wanted to talk?"

Ma seemed to hesitate, her expression was taut and he felt tension pool behind his shoulders as his head felt oddly heavy. His eyes flickered to the Haitian, the man stumbled slightly, his whole body was trembling and sweating.

"I cannot." The Haitian gasped and collapsed onto the floor. Nathan quirked an eyebrow.

_'They never learn.'_

Parkman stood tersely and Ma was looking up at him anxiously, Nathan took in the way Parkman was watching him, the tilt of his head, the sweat on his brow, the blood dripping from his nose.

"You don't look well Parkman." The man closed his eyes and shuddered, grasping onto the edge of the desk for support.

"I can't get in, he's... he's too strong, it's like there's two, two minds, I can't even find where the one ends and the other begins. I can't fight them both." Parkman muttered, looking suddenly nervous and a little green.

"Ah." Nathan supplied, stepping fully into the centre of the room and casting another look at the unconscious Haitian. "Yes well, I haven't been quite myself lately." He shrugged and came to stand in front of the desk, amused when Ma refused to shift an inch, despite Parkman's sudden retreat and the gun that was in his hand.

"A few months ago this would have all seemed very strange to me." Nathan commented, his left hand flicked up and the gun tore free of Parkman's hand and flew to his instead, he glanced at it before placing it down on the desk in front of him, pointing towards Ma. "But I've come so far since then."

"Nathan, listen to me, you're sick." Ma tried, he could hear the tension in her sharp voice.

"Funny... I've been thinking that lately too." He admitted not finding it amusing in the least. "When I found myself hovering inches from my sleeping daughters form fighting the urge to touch her, I feared I was going insane, that I was very, very sick." He smirked and she flinched, Parkman seemed rooted to the spot, looking as inconspicuous as a big man could in such a small room. "When I awoke to find myself covered in Tracy's blood, her skull cap lying not feet from me... there was disgust, oh believe me, I was horrified, but only a part of me was. The rest, well the rest of me found the whole thing incredibly satisfying."

"And when you killed Noah?" Ma hissed between pursed lips.

"Well you see, that's when I knew I was sick. That was the first time I truly felt like myself, like I was whole. Both halves in agreement... right when I snapped his neck."

"I'm sorry." Parkman's voice wavered and Nathan was struck by the honesty in it.

"I'm sure." Nathan replied smoothly, staring at the other man and recalling with vivid clarity the moment they had shared as he disarmed the bomb from around his chest. "But I'm not sure that's good enough."

"I shouldn't have let them talk me into it. We were wrong." Parkman admitted looking thoroughly disgusted with himself.

_'He's his father's son after all.'_

"Nathan you don't have to be this way, we can help you, let us help you." Ma pleaded and he fixed her with a knowing look.

"Nathan's dead." She shuddered violently and he was certain that tears shone in her eyes.

"No. He's standing in this very room." She stood, trying to impose herself upon him as she would have once done.

"You just couldn't leave it alone could you?" he sighed running a finger across his brow in weariness. "Couldn't just let me die, had to have it your way, on your terms, isn't that right Ma."

"Nathan please..." she began, his left hand waved and cut her off, her hands rose to her throat but she didn't make another sound as she clawed at the invisible binding.

Parkman apparently couldn't just stand by and watch, he charged at him, Nathan watched him incredulously as his feet left the floor and he was pressed back against the wall half way to the ceiling with a loud thud.

"No Ma." He returned his gaze to her. "You killed me." Her eyes widened in horror. "Every memory I have, every feeling, every single thing is tainted, corrupted, twisted. If I am Nathan then I am a perversion of everything that he once was; what he stood for. You didn't just kill me... you killed the memory of me."

Nathan's hand dropped and he released her with a look of disgust.

"I should kill you," he acknowledged and she grasped onto the side of the desk, buckled over, her hand around her bruised throat as she gasped for air. "I want to." He admitted, "I remember killing my mother, my _other_ mother. It's easier than you might think."

His eyes switched to Parkman as he hung pinned in mid air. "As for you... I think turn about's fair play, don't you?" He felt his arm raise and pain lanced all along his left side, he looked down, watching in fascination as the skin on his left hand rippled, twisting and changing. His eyes rose, things looked differently now through his left eye, sounded different. Parkman's mouth opened and closed wordlessly and Ma let out a pained sound. His left hand extended and he focused intently on Parkman, focused on their similarities... as a father, as a man disappointed in his own father and finally as a man that had wanted revenge so badly he was willing to cross any line, to discard his morals like the bothersome things they could be. He felt the minds around him open up as Parkman's ability flowed into him, becoming a part of him.

Nathan felt his mother's mind open and festering before him and he felt disgusted at the shrivelled creature he found there. Before he focused once more on Parkman, feeling the resistance, he could never have bested him alone, not within his mind, but Nathan wasn't alone. Understanding seemed to flow through him, lighting every neurone with a new fire as the nuances of Parkman's mind split open, revealed to him as clearly as if he'd carved his skull open.

_'Never alone.' _

"Never." He agreed and as one they pushed, and Parkman's mind fractured beneath their insistence, the Senator and Serial Killer.

_"You are a killer."_ They pushed the thought deep into the struggling man.

"No Nathan... NO!" Ma screeched he felt her pull the gun out and heard the shot ring out, but it never impacted, his left hand waved it away with ease to hit the wall and twisted to hold her immobile.

_"You snapped, the man hunt drove you mad, that's why you strapped that bomb to your chest on Capitol Hill. You want revenge."_ They insisted feeling it slide within Parkman's thoughts.

_"You killed Noah Bennet."_ Parkman thrashed his legs impacting violently against the wall, but his mind was limp, pliable in their hands; there was only the faintest flicker of protest as the memories were forced into his mind, erasing others.

_"You killed the Haitian." _A flick of their wrist and the gun his mother was gripping went off the bullet impacted with a wet sound and there was a splash of blood against the pale walls.

_"You tried to kill Angela Petrelli here today... tried to kill me." _The words sunk in without protest and the smirk lifted both corners of his mouth.

_"You're a killer. And you're going to run all the way home... to your son, and you're going to kill him." _There was nothing, no response no twitch as his mind collapsed around the weight of their insistence; fury welled they wanted the Parkman to struggle, just like he had.

_"Then you're going to remember who you are, you're going to see what you've done and you're going to pick up your gun and put it in your mouth. And pull the trigger." _It was done.

Nathan blinked and stepped back, Parkman slid to the floor, his head shot up, his pupils were so dilated they looked almost black. He was on his feet in a second charging past him and barrelling out of the door so that it almost splintered in two... running, running home.

"You monster!" Ma bit off, but her expression was set like stone.

"Takes one to know one Ma." He crossed to her and prised the gun out of her tightly curled fingers. "And you have only yourself to blame for this one."

"Go ahead... kill me! You've already destroyed everything." She snarled, but he could hear the heartbreak in her mind, and he softened momentarily, his hand brushing her cheek.

"I guess sometimes we are destined to become our fathers." He mused and heard the flash of concern across her thoughts. His fingers grasped her face and he drew their eyeline's together and pushed into her mind.

---*---

Nathan strode from the room, following the medical staff as they wheeled his comatose mother's body out, promising to give her the best care. The second gurney with a sheet over the body of the Haitian was wheeled in the opposite direction. Men in uniforms, others in suits were already heading out in search of Matt Parkman... they'd be too late.

The elevator doors slid shut around him and he slid his hands into his pockets, the smirk slipped onto his face easily.

_'And they say office work is dull.'_


	7. Into the Heart of Forever

Title: Whisper in my Ear  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if that's what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: The twisted inner battle of the new Nathan/Sylar Character  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13-R  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

**Chapter 7: Into the Heart of Forever**

Irritation set his teeth on edge and Claire's hand tightened in his grip, he spared her a glance, noticing the set of her jaw, a part of him, a larger part than he wanted to admit, was pleased that her concern was steadily giving way to irritation.

"Pete." He sighed wearily, rubbing his forehead and trying not to wrinkle his nose at the smell Peter was emitting. "You've been here almost five days straight, and four before that. I understand what you're going through but enough is enough."

Pete's eyes snapped up to him, they were so blank.

"Matt couldn't have done this Nate. I'm telling you, I don't believe it. To do this to Mom, then to go home and kill..." he trailed off looking sick.

"Pete." He tried to keep his tone of voice neutral. "I was there remember, he tried to kill me too, it's only by some miracle that Ma's shot missed me, but she always was a tough willed woman."

Claire spoke up quietly, her tone level, "I can't believe it either Peter, but there's evidence, I think he just snapped."

"He didn't snap. He was driven to it," those big brown accusing eyes levelled on him, "Or I should say you drove him to it... you and your witch hunt!"

"Peter, stop it!" Claire snapped at him, "Blaming Nathan won't change anything, it wasn't his fault, he didn't make Matt do anything; he made his own choices." Something flickered at the corner of his mouth as he heard Claire's internal rebuke, she was sincere.

"Pete you're going stir crazy. Do you honestly think this is what Ma would want, to see you sat here wasting away?" Nathan accused, trying reason, it wouldn't work, he could hear the turmoil that was Peter's mind... the poor boy was lost without mommy, his whole world view seemed to have skewed with the idea that even good men like Parkman could become killers.

"Please Peter. You need to stop this." Claire pleaded and Nathan placed a supportive hand on her shoulder.

"Honey. Why don't you go wait outside; or better yet why don't you go down to the car." Claire raised an eyebrow at him, her scorn at the comment evident, even if he couldn't read her mind.

_'Smooth.'_

Nathan's left hand brushed down her arm, and over to her back as he leant down to her ear, "Please let me deal with this, you being here just complicates matters... he thinks he has to be strong for you."

Claire's eyes flickered to Peter with distaste as he sat slumped in the hospital chair and Nathan was glad his face was buried from sight by her hair, because he really did smirk at her thoughts that time.

Nathan waited until the door clicked closed and he felt her presence leave his mind, at least partially, he never seemed to be able to completely shake her thoughts free when she was within a one mile radius.

_'Use Claire against him.' _The _other _informed him.

"Can't you see what you're doing to her Pete?" Nathan stepped forwards and pressed a hand to his shoulder, Peter's head fell forward and he heaved in a sigh of defeat as he brushed the back of Ma's hand with his finger. "Claire has lost so much already... she doesn't need to lose her Uncle, and her hero all at once."

"I was never anybody's hero." Peter muttered quietly.

_'Well at least we can cross self delusion off his list of faults.' _Nathan aimed a silent jab at his _other _self and tried to focus on the moment.

"_And you never really did much care for Claire... did you Pete_." Nathan's voice, but the words were the _other's_ this time. Peter's head snapped up and his dark circled eyes met his, confusion and anger warred inside of them.

"I know what you're doing... just stop it." Peter snapped, shoving his hand off him and stalking over to the window instead.

"_She's going to live forever you know." _The _other_ pressed and Nathan remained silent, curious as to how it would play out. Peter's head inclined fractionally, oh he was definitely listening. _"Alone." _The voice pressed and Peter's thoughts spiralled, for a moment he allowed himself the time to consider what that might mean. "_She told me that Sylar cornered her that day in the hotel room." _Peter stiffened and anger flooded through the younger man. "_That he was more than aware of that fact, and that she didn't have to be alone. He seemed to think they would be together... eventually." _Peter's thoughts twisted violently at the idea and he slammed his hand into the wall, bringing it back blood speckled but healing.

"He was insane though." Peter pointed out darkly.

"Maybe." Nathan conceded, silencing the _other_'s remark. "But it doesn't mean he didn't get to her that day. In case you haven't noticed she hasn't exactly been herself, losing her father hasn't helped matters. Losing you... well I think that might just finish her. She already lost Sylar."

Peter's head whipped around and he grasped Nathan's shirt, dragging their faces inches apart. "What are you getting at!" he snarled, poor boy his thoughts were in turmoil.

"_She mourned him you know._" Peter dropped him and backed away shaking his head. _"Oh not the monster... but she mourned for herself, after all at least if she could hate him for eternity, it was better than feeling nothing."_

"You don't know her." Peter snapped.

"And you do?" Nathan enquired genuinely curious as to whether his brother had the first clue about the inner workings of her mind now.

"No." He snarled, his lower lip curling down.

"You can live forever Peter... just like Claire, all you have to do is hold onto that wonderful ability of hers." Peter seemed to turn ashen and he looked away, unable to hold his eyes. "Just think; you could be her hero for eternity. Forever her constant, her respite from the cruel world, if you truly cared about her you'd see that she can't be alone."

The world fell out from under Peter and Nathan watched, listening as everything every shred of hope and strength seemed to crumble from his brother's frame. He never was much for responsibility, and he didn't have the heart for eternity. A notion flickered inside of Peter and began to roar like a flame doused in gasoline, and Nathan merely watched silently.

"I'm sorry Nathan." Peter looked up at him his eyes a swirl of emotions, "I can't be her hero... I can't live forever." Peter's hand whipped out and he brushed Ma's leaching her ability and losing Claire's. Nathan took a step forward, hesitant... 'this isn't what I want._' _He told the _other. _But Peter was already moving, the chair was in his hand and the glass was broken on the window.

Nathan took another step forward, his hand outstretched to his brother. "Pete stop, think about what you're doing." He implored him.

"I have Nathan. Tell her I'm sorry."

He jumped and Nathan raised his right hand, trying to stop him, to will him back, to pull him up, but his left hand remained rigidly fixed at his side and the _other _and his abilitieswere nothing more than a black wall of silence inside of him. But his right side was already leaping; he flung himself out of the window, his body straightening as he watched Peter falling beneath him.

He wouldn't make it. The certainty of the trajectory and the speeds fed into his mind with perfect understanding.

A blonde head lifted at the shout he hadn't realised he'd made, at the name he called as they plummeted to the ground. Claire's eyes widened and her mouth fell open in horror as she watched him streaking down through the air to the ever faster falling Peter.

Her legs were moving, she was sprinting away from the car. She would make it, certainty flooded him, just like the certainty that he wouldn't; she'd break his fall.

_'She won't.'_ The _other_ promised.

His left hand rose and Claire stumbled, her feet catching on the uneven ground; she landed heavily with a sharp cry of despair as Peter's body crashed into the ground inches from her with a sickening sound, her eyes remained fixed on his twisted body, as he lay immobile.

Nathan was frozen in mid air, his left and right hand outstretched; one to Peter, the other to Claire. His left was always stronger, the left succeeded where he failed...Peter was dead.

His feet touched the ground and he stared horrified, thankful for the late hour and the deserted street. No one should see Peter this way. _'No one should see what we did.'_

Claire had crawled across to Peter's body her hands shaking and slicked with Peter's blood as she grasped at him, cradling his face as she urged him to take her ability.

Nathan reached out with his mind; there was nothing to touch inside the body of his brothers. His knees collapsed from under him and he crumpled to the concrete heavily, feeling the tears on his cheeks. It was almost a relief, to know that he could still cry, could still grieve for the little brother he'd promised to protect from the moment his Ma had handed him to him as a child.

He left Claire to her grief, to her silent tears, she didn't scream or wail, not this time, her pain was too complete.

"I tried... he jumped. I wasn't fast enough." Nathan whispered, it wasn't a lie, not this time.

"Why?" Claire rasped bitterly, shaking Peter by his shirt front, but he couldn't answer her, he never would again. She slumped across him, clutching him to her like he had been her last hope as she cried silent tears for her hero.


	8. A Father's Love

Title: Whisper in my Ear  
Author: devilishlysas  
Pairing: Nylar (if that's what we're calling it) Nathan/Sylar  
Summary: The twisted inner battle of the new Nathan/Sylar Character  
Spoilers: Season 3 and finale - speculation on Season 5  
Rating: PG-13-R  
Disclaimer: I don't own heroes or its characters... sadly

**Chapter 8: A Father's Love**

On his 60th birthday Claire brought him a time piece, it was exquisite, the type he had always admired from afar, much like the woman herself. Her eyebrows raised as she took in his rather stunned look, the restaurant was deserted save for them, nothing was too good for the ex-president and his security staff, there was no reason for her to be coy it seemed.

"I thought it suited you." she replied softly, "I'm told it has aged incredibly well." He offered her a small smile, gently brushing the slightly greying hairs on his temples and the slight wrinkles around his eyes. _'Lies!' _The _other _hissed violently, its impatience had only grown with time, and its control only expanded. But he wasn't wrong, his face was a lie, a subtle one, but a lie none the less, one he wore for her and her alone. She of course was three years away from celebrating her 40th birthday and looked barely past 20, he envied her ability to not have to hide who and what she was.

_'I won't hide any longer.'_ The _other_ warned.

'No. We can't' He agreed silently, running his fingers over the intricately carved wooden features, listening to the mechanism and finding it flawless.

"Perfect, isn't it?" Claire asked, that eyebrow arched once more and a small smirk tugged at her lips. Her thoughts were usually so carefully concealed around him, how she'd learnt to do it he had no idea, but after what had happened to Parkman, to Ma, even to Peter, she was forever cautious of letting someone into her mind. But he could read her today.

"How long have you known Claire?" he asked her pointedly, lamenting that his position had kept them apart long enough for her to slip away from him.

She shrugged, playing with the stem of her wine glass whilst watching his face carefully.

"Long enough." She replied cryptically and the wall seemed to reform inside of her mind, closing her off from him. He could push, but that would only damage her in a place she might not heal.

"You never said." He pointed out, watching as she swirled the untouched wine in her glass.

"How could I? You were President, a great leader, a revolutionary. The man that introduced the _'specials'_ to the world, integrating them seamlessly. Next to that, what was the death of Noah Bennet."

"He was your father Claire." He reminded her and her fingers tightened around the glass so hard he feared she would shatter it.

"You're my father. So everyone reminds me daily."

"No." He sighed, "But then you already know that as well... don't you Claire."

Her eyes narrowed and she sat back in her chair, releasing the glass as she folded her arms across her chest, the beautiful gold dress only accentuating her colouring, no doubt her picture would be half way across the globe before the evening was out, the moment she stepped outside of the relative security of the restaurant. The price of fame he supposed.

"Say it Claire... I know you're dying too, I can hear it rattling around inside there." He tapped his temple and she went unnaturally still.

"Sylar's dead."

He felt the smirk rise onto his lips, it had been an age since anyone had said that name... he missed it.

"Yes and no." He took a sip of his own wine, and stared over the glass at her, she didn't move. "Much like Nathan is neither dead nor alive."

"Is that why you killed them? For killing you... both of you?"

Nathan watched her internally and externally, trying to decipher just how much she knew, what she had pieced together.

"Nathan was already dead." He replied succinctly. "What they did was worse, they destroyed his soul."

"And Sylar's?" she prodded her eyes hard and unreadable.

"Oh I think we both know he lost his a long time ago." Nathan's left hand rose and hers mirrored his until his hand slid over hers enveloping it, the feel of her soft skin causing his breath to hitch. He hadn't touched her in years. She didn't flinch, not externally, and the internal one was so small that he easily overlooked it.

"I'm curious Claire, I'll admit this isn't the reaction was I expecting from you."

"What could I do?" She replied coolly. "You took everything from me, the only thing you left me with was a lie... a lie I needed so badly that I refused to see the truth for two decades."

"I would never hurt you Claire." He promised. "Surely you know that."

"But anyone that comes between us?" bite crept into her words and he felt their sting. "Has it never occurred to you that there was a reason I never chose to have a relationship longer than a few months with anyone." She smiled sadly and he felt the heartbreak in her eyes. "Why I cut myself of from my own Mother and brother?" They fell silent.

"Why Peter." She whispered finally. "What had he done to you?"

"_He would have been your hero... as long as he was alive._" The _other _informed her sharply.

"And you couldn't take the chance that he might be alive forever." She nodded ruefully. "Logical I suppose, in a cold hearted way."

"I grieved for him." Nathan snapped. "I never wanted him to die. I didn't push him, he jumped." He reminded her.

"Oh you pushed him." Claire's voice lost some of its casualness and her lips pressed into a thin line as she glared daggers at him. "Just not physically."

He had no response to that.

"I suppose you were right." She admitted finally breaking the extended silence of their stare.

He quirked an eyebrow in response, waiting for her explanation patiently.

"I did love you after all... just not in the way you envisioned." Her hand slid from beneath his, he let it. "I can't kill you... lord knows I've thought about it enough times, made hundreds of plans, carried some of them out." She sighed wearily, "But I never could finish them."

She dropped his eyes and rose gracefully to her feet, smoothing down her dress and brushing her gold hair out of her eyes. "You won't see me again." She promised him.

"_I can always find you Claire. I always could_."

Her eyes narrowed and the corner of her mouth lifted fractionally, "I didn't say that you couldn't find me. I'm telling you not to." She turned her back on him and began walking away.

"Claire!" he called, getting to his feet and roughly shoving the table out of his way, ignoring the shattering glass. "I'm your father!" he snarled.

She stopped and looked back at him over her shoulder.

"I know." The smile she offered him was so sad that he felt physically pained by it. "Which is exactly why you'll stay away."

Nathan watched her leave unable to move.

_'NO!' _The _other_ roared, the compulsion to chase, to catch, to find her, take her, make her his was overwhelming. _'She's ours... mine, she loves us, we can't, won't, just let her leave!' _

But his feet remained rooted to the ground, Nathan glanced down at them and smirked, his right hand flexed and he raised his head again, watching her blonde head whip behind the heavy doors and out of his sight.

'Yes we will, because she loves us... we will.'

_'We can protect her, keep her safe; keep her forever.'_

'We only destroy her.'

'No!'

Nathan felt the grin slide into place as his right hand closed around the left.

'Yes.'

'_We're not her father!' _The voice raged.

'I am.'

--- _fin ---_


End file.
